Vintage Prostitutes!

I know that not everyone is personally interested in participation in sex work or consuming adult entertainment, but to go so far as to say that it is not a valid form of sexual expression is absurd. I just don’t understand. It crosses gender boundaries too. I’ve seen both men and woman say and do things that are very sex work negative. The latest thing that pissed me off was a posting in a sex-positive blog where a woman is writing about pornography and then goes on to write about how she doesn’t pay for porn and doesn’t need or want to pay for it. Thanks a lot for not supporting sex workers’ businesses. I’ll just pay my rent with all this sex-positive love I’m receiving from you.

If you’re not involved with porn production you might not realize how statements about not wanting/needing to pay for porn but expect to consume it anyway feel like you’re stealing a piece of my creative spirit. I take great pride in the work I create. It is a tremendous creative outlet for me, and when I was a stripper that was also a tremendous creative energy outlet. Hearing that you expect to be able to consume my creative energy without any exchange makes me ill. Literally. I feel my stomach knotting up as I write this.

If you are kink-positive then there is no reason to deny the validity of a fetish for consenting adults exchanging money in private for any variety of sexual entertainment services. For some reason the kink end of the sex-positive community is the worst, especially in targeting pro-dommes. It’s always baffled me how being an amateur and doing kinky things for fun is ok but if you’re a professional and want payment then you’ve just ruined “it” for everyone. In fact, the people that I meet in my private pro-domme practice are infinitely more interesting than the people I used to meet when I was in the BDSM scene. There are a few notable exceptions, including my roommate and current friends, but for the most part I prefer spending time with the guys that seek out a pro-domme. There are many people that don’t play in public for any number of reasons and I am so happy to meet these people through my pro-domme business.
What really strikes me as odd is the number of women that have entitled attitudes when it comes to sex work. The people that contact me for refunds or complaints about cyber-dyke.net membership identify themselves as female far more often than they identify themselves to me as male. I do get the occasional message from a guy that “doesn’t need to pay” for whatever sexual entertainment, thank you patriarchy. I’m not sure why women think that they are entitled to refunds or entitled to not pay for sexual entertainment. Another symptom of the patriarchy? Maybe women just aren’t as familiar with sex work business and don’t realize some dude already took advantage of some scam to get free adult entertainment years ago. I don’t know, but I would love to hear what other folks think and read other material on this topic. Doesn’t the sex-positive community realize how many current or former sex-workers are in their midst?

Kamala Devi’s videos and resources to save the temple
Tracy Elise’s info and updates (auto play video on home page)
The Temple was a member church of Oklevueha Native American Church and they posted bail, please support them
Devi Ma’s fundraising for legal defense

Zanele Muholi: Mapping and Archiving A Visual History of Black Lesbians in post-Apartheid South Africa Gorgeous photography and art about black lesbian’s lives in South Africa.

I think it’s a little hasty to say that this ancient person was gay, but a male skeleton was found buried as a female in a 5,000 year old grave.

Pakistan’s Lesbians Live In Silence, Love In Secret by Habiba Nosheen One of the Cyber-Dykes is Pakistani and she was very happy to be living in the US. I don’t know if she’s still in the US but my heart goes out to her if she had to go back to Pakistan.

Late-Life Lesbians’ Reveal Fluidity Of Sexuality It’s really fascinating to see this report on women that fall in love with women later in life after being married and having children. It’s really fantastic to see some recognition that women’s sexuality is very complex.

LKS, as it is affectionately known, has been around for years doing its level best to promote a healthy and positive image of lesbian sexuality. There is great information on our sex practices and you have a lot of fun along the way! The owners graciously let us have a peek inside their site and we can assure you that this is fun and informative resource not to be missed. 

What LKS does is provide us with straight-forward writing and depictions, in photos, fine art illustrations and videos, of our sex as it should be experienced. It does so in a way that is elegant without being stuffy or clinical or sacrificing hotness. After all, what we do together is very hot — what would be the point of diminishing that or toning it down? 

So if you want to know about anything from Lesbian fisting and female ejaculation to the secrets of oral sex, or if you are looking to spice things up or be inspired to try new positions for your favorite sexual activities, do check out Lesbian Kama Sutra! 

The cost is very modest and you’ll be a supporting a worthy cause — your own and your partners’ sexual fulfillment!

(and it’s really hilarious to see a marching band and mob of people singing and dancing in the middle of a nice hotel lobby)

“Don’t Get Caught in a Bad Hotel”

In response to a discrimination lawsuit, eHarmony is opening a matchmaking website for same sex couples after strongly resisting and refusing to work on same-sex relationships for years. They’re still icky evangelical, but in the event you want to see how they might match you up with another woman you can try out their new compatiblepartners dot net site.

And congrats to the Midwestern LBGT community for the right to same-sex marriage in Iowa!

My own feeling is that we’ve moved past the need for such drastic measures. Gay culture is developed enough that if someone wants to live primarily with and around gay people, they can do so. It would be difficult to find an all-lesbian area in modern society, but most women would probably say they can get the fulfillment of time spent around other lesbians at spaces that already exist. I feel a little hypocritical saying that when I live in DC, a city whose lesbian spaces have been cut down to practically nothing, but I do feel that it’s no longer necessary to get completely away from everyone else in order to celebrate your lesbianism.

If the label “man-hating” applies to any lesbians, the women who live on womyn’s lands would definitely fit the bill. They specifically shun the presence of men on their property, to the point of sending out an alert e-mail when a six-month-old baby boy was there. Although the New York Times author would have us believe the e-mail was sent “perhaps only partly” in jest, it sounds to me like a very real concern for these women. I don’t think hating men is healthy, to be honest. I don’t think hating anyone is healthy. The retort for this is probably “we don’t hate men, we just prefer not to have them around.” Which is all well and good, but I don’t think it’s necessary to be so militant about the issue.

Older lesbians might suggest that I don’t know what it was like in the 1970s, that I don’t understand why these communes were created. I accept that they were necessary at the time, but I don’t think we still need them today. Society is a very different place. If these women enjoy living off the land – that is, they are ruralists – that’s their prerogative. It’s the shunning of all-things-non-lesbian that bothers me. Time marches on, life goes on, etc.