New Cy-Dy Clips available!

June 25, 2009 | CyDy Network

I’ve been working on the Cyber-Dyke Clips store and set it up to offer a free 10 second preview of each clip. I know that female porn consumers are very cautious with their money, and I want to be able to really tempt you all. Head over to our Cy-Dy Clips store and see what we have. I’ll be updating with some of our new clips this week.

Visable: A Femmethology

June 1, 2009 | Literature

People always call me femme, but I have never identified as femme. I’m not really so fond of the butch femme dynamic. I’m not really interested in replicating hetero relationships and gender roles. I like stockings, heels, and I have a makeup kit like a drag queen, but I also own power tools, a motorcycle and big shit-kicker boots. I bake and I weld. I don’t feel like I am either butch or femme. I tried calling myself “soft butch” but people just called me femme anyway.

There is a new book out about femme identity. I was supposed to review the book and write up a blog for the virtual book tour in April, but I wasn’t able to open the file and read the book. I know it’s now June but I wanted to make sure to pimp the book anyway. They are going to be doing readings at SF Pride, but I don’t have the info on that yet. For now you can take a look at the Femmethology site and see what other folks are saying about this necessary and provocative book.

Revolutionize Your Period with Babeland!

May 31, 2009 | Health

I discovered reusable menstrual products years ago through the zines, DIY, and anarchafeminist scenes. I originally stumbled on a site by a group called Blood Sisters out of Canada. It took me a while to actually try it, but wow!! They are infinitely more comfortable than paper and plastic. It’s been an amazing few years. Previously I had been going through a box of tampons and month plus a couple of pads or pantyliners. It isn’t exceptionally expensive, but I’m always looking to save a few bucks. I was also going through a real anarchist phase and I wanted to reduce the number of products I used and stop participating in consumerism. I started by sewing some cloth pads from old flannel sheets. It was really easy and can be done by hand. I used those to replace the pads and pantyliners, but I still used regular tampons for another years. Resuable menstrual cups are a bit expensive and I didn’t have the money to buy one. I tried sea sponges instead. I actually bought them at the art supply store. For about two bucks I got a large sea sponge that I then cut in three pieces. Each piece could be used as a tampon for three or four months. That way I was getting at least nine months of tampons for only two dollars. That’s a real savings, and I never had to worry about running out to the store at all hours of the night because I was out of tampons.

I don’t know where you might be able to find resources on menstrual activism, patterns for sewing your own pads or alternative products these days. The Blood Sisters site seems to be gone. However, if you are the least bit curious, Babeland is giving away a Lunapads starter set!! I commented on the site, but I already have all the menstrual supplies I need. I hope it goes to one of you lovely ladies!!

Mary Roach: 10 Things You Didn’t Know About Orgasm

May 21, 2009 | Health, Sex

Mary Roach has written article, columns and books about the science behind common life events, and she is most well known for her books on death and sex. Recently she gave a short talk called 10 Things You Didn’t Know about Orgasm. Watch the entire fascinating video HERE

darkPlay.net

May 20, 2009 | Sex

Ah, darkPlay! In 2000 darkPlay.net opened it’s online doors and introduced the world to all the dark kinky fantasies that women have. Even today, nine years later, there are still people propagating the myth that women are only interested in romance, sensual, soft core, vanilla types of porn. darkPlay.net is documentary evidence that women have dark fantasies and enjoy watching decadently sleazy porn.

This photo is from a recent update at darkPlay.net and shows the sort of wonderfully sleazy porn that I think many women can get behind. Look at that hideous hotel bedspread! The models are really lovers off screen, they’re really enjoying each other, they’re really fucking and licking and kissing, they choose to embrace manicures and boob jobs for their own personal enjoyment, and they don’t care what anyone else thinks. This is truly feminist empowered pornography.

Sex Toy Shopping Spree!!

May 19, 2009 | Cool Links, Sex

I’m a little late on posting things as usual, but I wanted to make sure and share this with all of you lovely readers out there.

Ginger Leigh from Sextoys.com is giving away a $1000 sex toy shopping spree. Head over to blog.SexToys.com to see all the details. I’ll be working on my wishlist tonight.

Rules:

First, create your wish list. Any product found on Sextoys.com may be included in your wish list. The only restriction is that the TOTAL value of your wish list must be equal to, or less than $1,000. Ginger Leigh has a very strict budget, and if you go over by even 1 penny, you will be disqualified, so keep the calculator at the ready.

Next, post your wish list to your blog or forum. THIS IS IMPORTANT: Wish list posts must contain the following to be eligible.

The product’s name

A link to the product on Sextoys.com

One sentence on why you want the product.

Make sure that your post contains the product name, a link to it on Sextoys.com and a sentence about why you want it.

You can select any combination of products, as long as the value of the entire list does not exceed $1,000. You may not duplicate products; Ginger doesn’t want one person hoarding all of the Fantasy Swings.

The final line of your post should include the total cost of your list and a link directly to this blog entry.

SEE A SAMPLE POST HERE.

*IMPORTANT - While we link to Extreme Restraints, those products are not eligible for use.

Make sure you post on a blog that you own, or in a forum where you are a member in good standing. Wish lists posted in comments sections of others’ blogs or in public forums will be disqualified. If you post in a forum and your post is deleted, you will be disqualified.

Once you have posted your wish list on your blog, send the permalink to your wish list post, your name and a contact number to experts @ sextoys.com. All entries must be received no later than Friday, June 5, 2009. On Friday, June 12, 2009, Ginger Leigh will conduct a drawing for the winner. The Winner will be drawn at random from the entire pool of entrants.

If your name is drawn, you win your wish list that you have posted.

Weekly Prizes: On May 3, 10, 17, 24 and 31, we will award weekly prizes, selected from all entrants who have posted before each date. The Winners will be selected by Ginger Leigh and guest judges. The prizes are awarded as follows:

May 3rd – The wish list with the sexiest toys for couples will receive a prize.

May 10th – The wish list with the sexiest toys for women will receive a prize. (Co-sponsored by Hotmovies for Her)

May 17th – The wish list that is kinkiest and most original will receive a prize.

May 24th – The wish list with the sexiest toys for men will receive a prize. (Co-sponsored by Hotmovies)

May 31st – The wish list with the most toys for under $1,000 will receive a prize.

By entering the contest, you certify that you are of legal age to receive a sex toy and that sex toys may be delivered to the jurisdiction in which you live. Contestants must be at least 18 years of age (21 years of age in some jurisdictions). Sextoys.com reserves the right to request a copy of a photo identification to verify age.

Spamming: You may create your wish list on your own blog, or in a forum where you are a member in good standing. Wish lists created in comments sections on other’s blogs, public forums such as Craig’s List, About, and other public forums will be disqualified. Sextoys.com does not support, nor tolerate the creation of spam.

Email: Do not email a wish list. Wish lists sent by email will be deleted.

Prizes: Grand Prize is all of the toys on the winning entry’s wish list for free (up to $1,000) delivered free of charge to an eligible winner.

Out of Stock: If a product on your wish list is out of stock, or discontinued before the contest ends, we will allow you to choose a product, or products of equal value to replace it.

Eligibility: No purchase is necessary to enter. Employees of Sextoys.com and any affiliated companies, as well as immediate family members of those employees, are not eligible to enter or win prizes. You must be 18 years of age (21 in some jurisdictions) or older to enter. By entering, you certify that you are able to legally receive shipments of adult novelties in your jurisdiction. Sextoys.com reserves the right to request a copy of a photo identification to verify the age of the winner.

Warranty: Sextoys.com offers no warranty on prizes.

Minx Addiction

May 17, 2009 | Cool Links, Sex

Minx is one of our long time Cyber-Dyke girlfriends with a personal website, MinxAddiction.com She is one of the few authentic goth altporn models out there with her own solo website. I know there are a ton of altporn and gothic fetish sites out there, but Minx is real. She may not be covered in tattoos and piercings but she’s not a plastic LA porn star doing it for the money. She’s a real grrl next door. She’s a woman that you would have in your criminal psych class or run into at a small metal or punk show. In addition to her website, she’s been featured in several different magazines such as Secret and Bizarre.

Minx is a juicy sweet femme who likes it on the bottom even though she’s a real tough gal. She was one of Zille’s lovers and then seduced Chrissy and Penny and the whole Cyber-Dyke staff really. Her website is now available to all cyber-dyke subscribers, so head on over to MinxAddiction.com to see all of her hot photos, video and writings.

Amazon Fail

April 13, 2009 | Literature, News Reports

There has been considerable noise in the blogosphere lately about Amazon.com “accidentally” de-ranking thousands of gay and lesbian books. Without a sales ranking, it’s hard to find those books in search. In theory, this was done because the books were considered “adult” - and yet none of the straight “adult” books were de-ranked. The situation has been called AmazonFail on blogs and Twitter, where the news has been spreading like wildfire. The latest update is that Amazon admits the mistake was “embarrassing” - but they haven’t apologized for it yet. Some people have linked to a LiveJournal post claiming to have automated the reporting of GLBT books as being “adult” but personally I don’t think that was legit, I think it’s someone trying to get fame for it. I think it was just a dumb fluke on Amazon’s part. That said, I’m pleased to note that our recommended reading (as seen in the right-hand column) is provided by Powell’s, an independent bookstore headquartered in Portland, OR.

eHarmony goes gay!

April 4, 2009 | News Reports

eHarmony goes gay!

In response to a discrimination lawsuit, eHarmony is opening a matchmaking website for same sex couples after strongly resisting and refusing to work on same-sex relationships for years. They’re still icky evangelical, but in the event you want to see how they might match you up with another woman you can try out their new compatiblepartners dot net site.

And congrats to the Midwestern LBGT community for the right to same-sex marriage in Iowa!

Biphobia hurts us all

March 24, 2009 | Sex

I recently had some serious problems with a woman I was dating accusing me of being “not gay enough.” She told me that she thought I could never commit to a woman and that I was just in it for the sex. And OMG I have straight male friends that I might somehow accidentally fuck one day. Heaven forbid I allow a real live penis within fifty feet. This is not the first time I’ve encountered these “not gay enough” games and I’m frustrated by the whole thing. I really hate having to prove myself to be gay enough just because I’m willing to admit that I’ve had relationship with men and I make lesbian porn. How on earth would I prove that I’m gay enough? Do I have to get married or what? The California courts are still deciding on the same-sex marriage issue, so I don’t know if I could get married at this point in time.

I understand that there are quite a few women at the clubs who are looking for a threesome or a lesbian experience to show off to their boyfriends. I think these women are pretty obvious, so if you’re not interested it’s easy enough to avoid. I have no problems avoiding these types of situations! I also know that there are plenty of lesbians who have had relationships with men, myself included. I’m very aware of the dyke drama of who slept with a man this week. We all know that these things happen and we’re all still gay queer lesbians.

There are some huge misconceptions about bisexual women not being very queer, not being able to commit to women, only being interested in sex and that sort of thing. Tell me you don’t know any lesbians who are promiscuous and have commitment issues! Bisexual women are no different from us. They just happen to also be interested in men. We all know that labels for sexual orientation and gender identity can be just as troublesome as they are useful. I think it’s really pretty absurd to start excluding people and distancing them from the community when they want to be involved. I also know a number of gender queer and trans-folk that identify as bisexual because their own gender identity is fluid. All of these people are our allies, and we need all the allies we can get. Bisexual women are not trying to crash our party. They’re not trying to take advantage of us. Why does it matter so much if your ex left you for a man? She would still be your ex if she had left you for another woman.

Accusing and excluding only tears our community apart. Accusing women of not being gay enough is really unnecessary. Not only does it distance sincere lesbians, but it also turns away our bisexual allies. If you are not personally interested in romantic relationships with particular women, that’s your business. Don’t go ruining the scene just because you think someone is “not gay enough.”